The area of control in relationships has to do with decision making ability, willingness to assume responsibility, and the need for independence. You are not likely to encounter many people who are Sanguine in Control. Primarily males, the comprise less than two percent of the population.
This rare and challenging area of the temperament is in a way “double-minded.” The problem comes because while one who is Sanguine in Control will want to be in charge, but also want others to be in control. Typically they will flip-flop from one mode to the other. This instability can lead to neurotic conditions.
This independent/dependent conflict is unusual, and is discussed much more at length in both of the courses offered! All of the other temperaments are stable: Melancholy In Control people are always independent, Choleric in Control individuals are always domineering. A Sanguine in Control, will shift from independence in one situation or time to being highly dependent at another time or place.
When a Sanguine in Control is in the independent mode, they tend to be really independent, making Cholerics look timid. They will be demanding, aggressive, and willing to assume nearly any responsibility or job. Next thing you know, this general becomes a private, dependent and self-indulging.
The Sanguine in Control actually needs a terrific amount of support, praise, and commendation. If things go wrong, or he does not feel sufficiently appreciated, he will sink into a mire of self-pity, drowning in a sea of resentment. Criticism will also send a Sanguine in Control into dependent mode. They will just drop everything and shrink from their duties and responsibilities. They may have volunteered for difficult or challenging jobs, but at the first sign of trouble, they give up.
To help keep a Sanguine happy and positive, there are a number of things others can do for them:
- Tell them daily that they are appreciated and loved
- Provide opportunities for them to be with other people
- Always accept them, never reject them
- Physical expressions of caring, toughing and hugging are always appreciated by Sanguines
- Praise and recognition is worth more than gold to a Sanguine
A Sanguine can help themselves by:
- Learn to recognize anger as anger and deal with it in a Godly manner
- Find situations where they can interact with other people
- Find work that involves relating to other people. (Sanguines make great salesmen)
- Keep a radio or TV on if doing work without the company of others
- Sanguine children will really appreciate the company of a TV at night
- Learn how to find substitutes for other people, such as using the telephone, reading about people, watching TV about people
- Hold hands, hug, kiss, touch, get your physical needs for human contact met
- Maintain a personal relationship with God, and don’t forget to ask for help
